


Not a deathtrap

by JeromeProton



Series: that au where the kids are superheroes and the trolls are supervillains [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Superheroes/Superpowers, Short, the kids are heroes and the trolls are villains
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-31
Updated: 2020-07-31
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:08:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25625692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JeromeProton/pseuds/JeromeProton
Summary: the vigilante known as the Red Raven has been captured by the criminal mastermind known as Lady Scales
Series: that au where the kids are superheroes and the trolls are supervillains [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1857562
Kudos: 6





	Not a deathtrap

The Red Raven has been matching wits with the so called Lady Scales for a while now, but this is his first time, outside of some prerecorded messages, hearing her voice . It is also his first time being captured by her. His bro said you could tell a lot about a villain from their deathtraps, but he really isn’t learning anything he didn’t already know about his captor from the giant scrap metal birdcage she’s trapped him in. It’s poetic and ironic, just like everything she does. It’s also almost disappointingly obvious, and lacking the insanity and garishness of a lot of her other… work. Perhaps this is her way of trying to set a professional tone?  
Or maybe he’s reading too much into it, sometimes a deathtrap is just a deathtrap, though there doesn’t seem to be much death in this trap. No dangling over a pit of acid or anything like that, just a simple cage. Maybe it’s just a trap.  
The good lady is pacing around his enclosure like a vulture when she breaks the silence. Her voice is loud, grating and hard to understand. It’s a voice that has taunted him from abandoned bases of operations and cassette tapes, it is a voice made for evil laughs.  
It is not laughing now.

TEREZI:W3 R34LLY H4V3 QU1T3 4 LOT 1N COMMON  
DAVE:oh come on youre way crazier than i am  
DAVE:i put on a rad ass bird suit and punch criminals in the face to stop crime  
DAVE:you put on a weird dragon trenchcoat thing and execute public figures via hanging to stop crime  
DAVE:you even write weird creepy leetspeak nursery rhymes about their crimes in chalk  
DAVE:like  
DAVE:your evidence tends to be pretty spot on  
DAVE:and i guess you couldve used blood  
DAVE:but just cause youre not max level psycho doesnt mean were anywhere near the same level of insanity  
TEREZI:W3LL W3 H4V3 ON3 TH1NG 1N COMMON 4T L34ST  
TEREZI:W3 BOTH S33 TH3 WORLD 4S 1T 1S  
TEREZI:M3T4PHOR1C4LLY 1N MY C4S3

She takes off mask, revealing some pretty gnarly scarring around the eyes, probably burn marks.

TEREZI:TH4TS WHY 1M NOT GO1NG TO K1LL YOU R1GHT NOW  
DAVE:well shit you really are blind  
DAVE:i thought you were just playing that up to go with your whole justice thing  
DAVE:and that you were just talking about smelling my hair and stuff cause you were just really creepy  
TEREZI:1 4M R34LLY CR33PY D4V3  
DAVE:wait  
DAVE:fuck  
DAVE:how do you know my name  
TEREZI:1T W4S PR3TTY OBV1OUS  
TEREZI:4 B1LL1ON41R3 PL4YBOY R4PP3R W1TH 4 MYST3R1OUS P4ST JUST H4PP3NS TO SHOW UP 4T TH3 S4M3 T1M3 4S 4N 3QU4LLY MYST3R1OUS COSTUM3D V1G1L4NT3  
TEREZI:B3S1D3S TH3R3 COULDNT POSS1BLY B3 TWO P3OPL3 4S COOL 4S YOU  
TEREZI:OR 4S H4NDSOM3 >:]  
TEREZI:YOU WOULD H4V3 TO B3 SOM3 K1ND OF 1D1OT TO M1SS 1T  
TEREZI:4ND 1 4M NOT SOM3 K1ND OF 1D1OT D4V3  
DAVE:you can stop using my real name now  
DAVE:i get it  
DAVE:you know who i am  
DAVE:you can murder me in my sleep or whatever  
DAVE:none of my totally real friends or loved ones are safe  
DAVE:except wait a second  
DAVE:i don’t have any friends or loved ones to kill  
DAVE:im completely alone  
DAVE:and thats totally a badass vigilante thing  
DAVE: and not an expression of deep psychological trauma  
DAVE:except wait maybe theyre the same thing  
DAVE:maybe im just beating up criminals and shit to try and get back a childhood i never really had  
DAVE:or to live up to the example of my totally rad bro and try to make him proud even though hes dead and he died before i got good enough for him to be proud of me  
DAVE:but psych  
DAVE:im a rad bird man hero guy  
DAVE:i dont have any feelings  
DAVE:except brooding and punch  
DAVE:anyway thats besides the point  
DAVE: the point being that you just got owned  
DAVE:cant threaten my family if i dont have one  
TEREZI:1T’S 1MPR3SS1V3 HOW QU1CKLY YOU R3G41N3D YOUR COMPOSUR3 D4V3  
TEREZI:BUT NOT SURPR1S1NG  
TEREZI:YOU H4V3 SO MUCH POT3NT14L  
TEREZI:BUT YOU W4ST3 1T B34T1NG UP P3TTY TH13V3S 4ND G4R1SHLY COSTUM3D T3RROR1STS 1NST34D OF 4DDR3SS1NG TH3 ROT AT TH3 COR3 OF TH1S C1TY  
TEREZI:OF TH1S WORLD  
TEREZI:YOU 4ND YOUR C4NDY COLOR3D FR13NDS H4V3 B4R3LY M4D3 4 D3NT 1N TH3 CR1M1N4L 3L3M3NT  
TEREZI:1 H4V3 M4D3 4 D3NT  
TEREZI:1 H4V3 BRU1S3D TH1S C1TY  
TEREZI:1 C4N SM3LL 1T’S D4RK TH1CK D1RTY BLOOD R1S1NG TO TH3 SURFACE  
TEREZI:1T 1S 4 SW33T SM3LL D4V3  
TEREZI:TH3 SM3LL OF JUST1CE  
TEREZI:UNT3MP3R3D BY INT3RF3R3NC3 OR M3RCY  
TEREZI:SW33T3R TH4N TH3 CH3RRY C4NDY OF YOUR COSTUM3  
DAVE:you seem to think youre batman  
DAVE:but we cant both be the batman in this relationship  
DAVE:and im clearly the badass vigilante with a tragic backstory and chiseled abs here  
DAVE:so that makes you the batshit crazy clown man with a weirdly homoerotic fixation on me and a terrible fashion sense  
TEREZI:WHY C4NT 1 B3 BOTH >:?

With that, she walks back out into the dark, leaving the Raven alone in his dimly lit cage. Soon after she leaves, the lightbulb hanging from the top of his cage goes out, leaving him in darkness.


End file.
